


You Make Me Hot And Bothered (I’m Not Complaining)

by ForTheFandom



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-12-03 05:33:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/694720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForTheFandom/pseuds/ForTheFandom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While on a quest for knowledge, Castiel senses somethings wrong. Upon further inspection, it seems to involve Sam Winchester and a powerful being. How will Dean take the news…? But more importantly, how will Cas keep it in his mind-pants…?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Make Me Hot And Bothered (I’m Not Complaining)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HieiandKuramaLover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HieiandKuramaLover/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Sweetest Thing](https://archiveofourown.org/works/591977) by [HieiandKuramaLover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HieiandKuramaLover/pseuds/HieiandKuramaLover). 



> i need this beta’d. anyone? it didnt really turned out the way i planned it to. i need to practise my Castiel interpretations. please give me some pointers (have pity), its my first Destiel.  
> (IF THE EDITS DONT MAKE SENSE, PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN FIX IT)

**CHAPTER ONE** **: _Your Face Is Too Close To My Face (Please Move)_**

 

 

 

 

Castiel had been attracted immediately, the scent of disturbing acts and supernatural-y stuff filling his vessels nostrils.

 

* * *

 

 

 

>  
> 
> Castiel had decided soon after meeting Dean - _and his sarcastic tendencies_ \- that he would learn as much as he could about the normal human being. Being the super serious, ' _no bollocks_ ' angel that he was, his first atempt to gain knowledge on the average man was a very direct one. Somehow, Cas had gotten it into his head that the most efficient way to learn about humans was to go straight up to the things themselvs and ask. So obviously, it was a great surprise to Cas when he found himself being taken away by two huge men in white.
> 
>  
> 
> Cas really had nothing else to do besides sit in the extremely cussioned seats with his hands handcuffed to a rail. Dean had told him that if he somehow got taken by the authorities or someone tries to institutionalise him, that he shouldn't zap out of there unless he had to. To only fly off when no one could see him or else questions would come to light. There was nothing else to do, except maybe stare at the floor in deep contemplation.
> 
>  
> 
> This situation didn't make sense to Castiel. All he did was demenstrate his angelic powers by bringing the dead pig on the table back to life. It's not Cas' fault that it went crazy and bucked the man in the face. The guy did ask for proof. Besides, he had healed him ( _Well, if he was honest, it was Dean who had made these points. Cas still felt guilty)._ What did he do wrong? According to Dean, nothing. - _But Cas was starting to doubt the honesty in the older Winchesters opinions-_
> 
>  
> 
> Now Cas was stuck in a mental institution. Stuck in a mental instution, waiting for the Winchesters to come bail him out. Cas may not have known much about the human mind, but he knew enough to realise that vanishing into thin air in an asylum built for the insane would be enough of a shock to break one.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> "I do not understand." After three days of extreme contemplation, Castiel was yet to comprehend why the direct approuch hadn't worked. By then, Sam had forged medical papers to present to the hospital. They had happily handed Mr.Coners ( _A.K.A Cas)_ over to them, to be taken to a more elite prison.
> 
>  
> 
> " _It's not that hard a concept to grasp. IT'S ACTUALLY REALLY OBVIOUS!_ "
> 
> "Dean, calm down. If it was obvious to Cas that any normal person would call the police when confronted by a man claiming to be an angel of the lord, then he wouldn't have had to spend three days in an asylum **."** Dean looked at Sam as if he were speaking Enochian. "Because he would already understand the way normal people think? **"**
> 
> _"I knew that."_ Contrary to popular beliefe, Dean really did. He's just stressed due to the long-ass drive from California to Texas. for some bizare reason, Dean always vented his anger on Cas. Personaly, Dean just thinks it's because he knows Castiel can take it.
> 
> "I apologize. Upon further inspection, I now realise the blunt nature of my actions. Next time, I will try a child. They are easier to manage."
> 
> " _Cas, no. Next time, you do it my way. no more of this direct approuch business."_
> 
> "What do you suggest I do?"
> 
> " _Do what all the geeks like Sammy do when hungry for knowledge."_
> 
> "And what's that supposed to mean **?"**
> 
> " _Go to the library."_ Dean said this with his best ' _i-am-so-funny-and-you-know-it'_ look.
> 
> __________________
> 
>  
> 
> Since that horrid car ride back from the institute, Castiel immediately started searching. Being an angel of the lord and all that, Castiel had been required to read every single book about everything and anything ever. Heavens library stretched to infinity. And in that infinity, Cas could not find front desk. In reality, he didn't know why he was looking in Heaven. He'd already read ever book. One would think that the best place to learn about Humanity was in the place it had been constructed. But, no. That meant that Castiel had to scower the Globe to gather all the books that could help him better understand the human race. 
> 
>  
> 
> He'd been half way done with the major continents and was just finishing off the East Coast when he had felt, what Dean liked to call, ' _A disturbance in the force'._ (why Dean made references to Cas that Cas didn't get is beyond him.)

 

 

* * *

 

 

Cas could feel a familiar essence. he could also feel how hot it was in here. Yes, he was an almighty angel, but that doesn't mean he can't get a little over heated. It was definetly cold outside. He had crossed a few radio waves in his search for books and he recalled a good amount of them stating the weather forcast. One voice said it would be "nippy", but he hadn't understood what that entailed.

 

He took a moment to look around. By look around, I mean stare at each individual area of the room until the world died. Not many people knew why Castiel made it a point to stare at everything in a room individually for 10 minutes. Although, the people who knew why, didn't really want to expand their theory. Dean knew. Cas is sure of it. Sure of it because Dean does it too. He just doesn't take a millenia.

 

 

 

Castiel wasn't sure what he thought he sensed. He definitly sensed a Winchester. And judging by the state of the bed, it was most likely Sam. He stood for a moment to formulate his next plan of action. Castiel was smart. Not many people knew that. Sam knew it, Bobby, Gabriel, and even his Father knew it - _why the hell do you think he's still alive_ -. Dean also knew that Castiel was highly intelligent, just bad with words. Castiel knew Dean knew, and that bothered him. I don't know if you've noticed but, not many things bother Castiel. Why did Dean treat him as if he had "a few screws loose"? - _or at least, thats how he thinks the phrase is used_ -. Cas can take a lot of things from a lot of people. Most of the time, he can take most things from Dean. But then, thats only most of the time.

 

Shaking out of his haze, Castiel focused his thoughts on the location of the more difficult of the Winchesters. Finally pinpointing his destination, Cas spread his wings. The only thing on his mind was finding the hunter.

 

"I must alert Dean"

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Ever since TV land, Cas had been checking up on the Winchesters far more often. It started with him coming only when there was an immediate danger or emergency that had to be deal't with right that instance. But, it slowly transitioned into popping in just to have some friendly conversation: Cas, with that giant stick up his ass, usually started with a very formal "Hello, Dean." 

 

 

Dean would take a moment sigh and rub a hand over his face, then reply _"Cas, what did we talk about last time_?". And as smart and old as Cas was, he never really paid attention to human rules: "Personal space".

 " _No, Cas, but that's important too_."  Dean was obviously bothered by how close the angel was to Dean. They had indeed talked about personal space. Apparently, it didn't improve anything. Here Dean was, trapped between the wall next to the mini fridge and Castiel's short vessel. Dean had made a motion with his hands, clearly indicating that Cas needed to back the fuck up. Cas wasn't having any of that, so he remained right where he had popped in.

 

"I am sorry. I cannot remember any other instance where we had had a ' _talk_ '", Cas just HAD to make quotation marks with his fingers to emphasise 'talk'.

 

Dean was expecting the angel to step back a few paces, that didn't happen. So he went on: _"Last time I saw you, you asked me about my day_." Cas really feels like he hasn't made any progress with the whole 'understanding humans' thing. Because, he was under the impression that asking someone about their day was being polite. He knew it was polite because he had read a book on etiqette.

 

 

By now, Castiel had his trade mark 'confused head tilt' going on and Dean's about to burst. He still didn't move back. Dean was getting squirmy. Cas remembered the personal space talk, so what the fuck? Seriously though, this is stressing Dean out. It's not as if Cas' looming over him. If anything, Dean looks like the one getting too close. But to someone who was raised the way Dean was, then two men standing this close to each other didn't seem natural. " _Unless_ ," Dean thought " _If only we were lovers. Damn, then this ridiculous personal space issue wouldn't be a problem_ ". This was a huge problem to Dean, actually. He was quite restrained. Dean's good with self control, but Cas can kinda tell Dean is pissed because his face was slightly irritated, but his thoughts were all " _COME ON!!!!!YOUR nose IS LIKE 3 FRIGIN inchesAWAY FROM MINE?!!! WHY DONT YOU get it??_ "

 

"I don't understand the problem." Of. Fucking. Course. Castiel didn't understand the problem. 

 

" _The problem, Cas, is that after I answered, you responded by telling me all about how you stared at the Lincoln Memorial for over an hour and came to the conclusion that the nose was crooked. Then you were just gonna leave. I told you right then that if you were coming to visit, then it had to be with a significant reason._ "

 

"Yes, now I do recall such an instance." Castiel looked away from the hunter. Somewhat embarrassed by his forgetfulness. This made Dean twitch just a little bit. Cas is embarrassed he forgot something, _SO,_ why the fuck isn't he embarrassed about his face basically smashing into Deans? He seriously can't stress this enough.

 

" _So, this better be damn important. Doctor sexy MD is on and they've added a lesbian._ " You didn't have to assume or guess if Dean was happy about this because his smile was wide and to add some finesse, he even gave a little bit of an eyebrow wiggle. By now, Dean had semi-wiggled past Cas, in a vain attempt to see the TV. This was in vain due to the annoying fact that he and Cas' chests were now completely flushed against one another. Dean could hear Castiel's vessels heart beat. If you had asked him then, he would've told you it was the most soothing sound he had ever heard. If you had asked him now, though, he would have killed you. Not for being there undetected, but because he would be embarrassed.

 

 

Cas' face contorted at that little snippet of information, though. Why would Dean need lesbians? He had him, right? If Dean wanted to be entertained, then Cas would do it. He admits he isn't as creative as Balthazar or Gabriel, but he would try his best. Cas would do anything for Dean. Castiel **WANTS** to help Dean. Despite his good intentions, the angel would most likely end up doing more bad then good. And since he knows this, he doesn't force it. It is true, Castiel would do anything for Dean. But only if he asked. ( _proud, stubborn, and bad with expressing himself. Thats why Cas reads minds)_ _  
_

 

 

"I think your brother may have been…" Castiel paused, how could he phrase this statement in a way that didn't cause Dean to have a panic attack? Cas looked away. Dean now had one hand on Cas' chest and another on his shoulder. He squeezed tightly around Cas' shoulder then pushed him back so he could look into his eyes.

 

 _"Sammy? Alright, out with it. Cas, if this is about Sam then its important_."

 

"Well, I have reason to believe that Sam **may** have been…". Cas averted his gaze, too embarrassed to face the man he believed he would soon break emotionally.

 

"Deflowered." Deans jaw dropped down to a level Cas had not been aware was physically possible. Dean didn't even have to say it because Cas knows what he's gonna ask. Cas has been wrong before, so he knows the doubtful questions. Dean asks the questions anyways: " _How do you know it was Sam? Where?_ "

 

"I sensed his fading presence, motel room."

 

"Y _ou're sure Sam was deflowered_?" Dean did a very good job at hiding the worry in his voice up until now. Cas assumed that he hid his concern by instinct to reassure others, and also, himself. His voice cracked at the mention of his baby brother being violated. Only after Dean had looked away, did Castiel realize that Deans hand was gripping tightly to his shoulder. When Dean had met Castiels gaze, he had noticed that his other hand was scrunched up in Castiels now wrinkled trench coat. But then, Deans expression loosened, and he added: " _And that he didn't just pick someone up?_ "

 

"I do not see why Sam would be lifting anyone."

 

 To Castiel's visible surprise, Dean is suddenly taking this information very well. Too soon to, if you asked him. So well, in fact, that he may have heard a faint giggle leek from Deans throat. 

 

 

"This isn't funny, Dean."

 

" _Oh, yes it is._ "

 

"What do you mean?" Cas was now modeling his not so stern but equally sexy (in Deans opinion) head tilt. This time, it leaned to the left. 

 

" _Sam went out just a little over an hour ago. I would hope that he would've gotten SOMEONE in that amount of time_."

 

"I don't get what you mean? I was told that forced adultery was wrong."

 

" _It is, **very wrong**. Sam went out to snag a date. Just a quick fling, NO-STRINGS-ATTACHED.  Understanding any of this?_  "

 

"No, I am not understanding."

 

" _Do I have to spell it out for you_?" A quick note, I would like to clarify that Dean said this with all the sarcasm in the world. This phrase is one of the oldest sarcastic phrases ever. It's up there with "Nice shirt" and "cool." BUT, despite the thickest level of sarcasm ever, Castiel managed to completely miss all of it. Dean's almost surprised that Cas doesn't hear Dean's  _'Will-to-live'_ go right over his head and into the bin.

 

 

"That would actually be very helpful, thank you. I know I am often an inconvenience to you."

 

" _No, no you're not, Cas. And its an expression, I'm not really going to spell it out for you._ "

 

 "I would be worried, Dean. He might still be in danger."

 

" _Cas, I highly doubt Sam was forced into anything. Have you EVER seen him? Guy's like a mountain_."

 

" Yes, I am aware of Sam's freakish height. But I do not see how this has anything to do with his body measurements."

 

" _Don't tell him I said this, but Sam is tall and smart. And both me and him are very toned. Yeah, Sam's made some bad choices with women, but so have I. I really doubt Sam would let his guard down so easily._ " 

 

Cas just stares at him. Half of him not blinking because everything Dean is saying makes complete sense, and half not moving because Dean's hands are still on him and holding him tight.

 

"I see your point." Cas was going to continue, but he really needed to get his shit together. Because, if Cas opens his mouth to try and make words, he's pretty sure that the only thing that would come out would be a high pitched screech. When Cas got nervous, he tended to silently start wheezing. An angel wheezing sounds like wheezing to an angel, but to humans, it's more like scratching silverware on plates, rubbing foam peanuts together, and crying babies times 999,999,999,999,999,999,476,297,593,001. Actually, it's worse.

 

 _"Good. Then you can step back a little so I can sit on that couch, watch Doctor Sexy, and try to keep down a Bob's Burger with beer."_   Dean was sort of hoping that instead of moving away, Castiel would drag him down and give himself to Dean, but he would never say it. Castiel then wonders if he should step back, or ravish the hunter. No, he's got shit to do. Ravishing can be done later. So, he stays put, the only thing changing is his expression. An expression that say's _'Obey-me_ '.

 

"I cannot do that, Dean."

 

" _Why the hell not_?"

 

"I don't think you should ignore the issue involving your brother." 

 

" _But you haven't told me anything significant. Sam, who was looking for ass to begin with, got ass in a motel room_. C _an you please elaborate a little more, or get out because in 5 minutes, its Doctor Sexy time."_

 

"I don't think this is an appropriate time for you to live out your role-playing fantasies, Dean." Now _that_ got Deans attention. Or, at least, a very surprising face. Dean had been having dreams of Doctor Sexy M.D. Except, he was a male nurse, and Castiel was Dr.Sexy. Castiel almost smiled at Deans stuttering. Dean usually had a snappy remark to throw at him and make him feel insignificant, so seeing that same man trying to find his vanishing tongue was very pleasing. 

 

"This is going nowhere. I'll just show you."

 

"W _hat? Wait Ca-_ "

 

Castiel then lifted his arm and up to Deans forehead. This happened relatively quick, due to the solid fact that Castiel was STILL only 3 inches away from Dean.

 

And without warning, Dean found himself inside an unfamiliar room, surrounded by unfamiliar objects, and currently standing in something extremely sticky. He was pleased to see that it was not someones personal brand of milk. Unfortunately, syrup is harder to clean. Dean hated this unfamiliarity. But the one thing Dean hated more than that, was the smell of salty gunk mixed in with whipped cream.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Dean was busy dodging spots of sugary liquid while Cas stared about the room in deep thought. Seeing this, Dean struggled to keep his chuckle hidden because here he was. Here Dean was in a motel room, surrounded by things he despises, seriously moving to keep his shoes clean, trying hard to suppress a laugh because Castiel was looking at this disgusting room as if hidden in its walls was the worlds greatest wisdom.

 

"Now, do you see why this was so important?" Deans not having much fun today. He'd spent the day at the library looking through dusty books no one has looked at in years, and watching Sam squirming. By the tone of Castiels voice, Dean knows not to try to have fun.

 

_"No. No, I don't."_

_"_ Can't you feel it?"

 

_"If by 'it' you mean the slimy puddles and by 'feel' you mean I have the feeling that this stuff will stain, then yes. Do you?"_

 

"No."

 

 _"Then, damn. You're obviously Sherlock in this story. So, tell me Mr.Holmes, what the fuck don't I see?_ "

**Author's Note:**

> i dont know what to do with this. Castiel is a bit OOC and i may or may not have made it seem like Dean is a little less worried than he should have been about the whole thing. please tell me how i can change it. i tried my best to make it at least somewhat humorous (AND THAT IS PROBABLY WHY DEANS SO CHILLAX)


End file.
